Mexican men: what are they like and what can you expect when dating a Mexican guy?
First and foremost, it is important not to stereotype or generalize when talking about dating Mexican men. A person’s race, nationality, or culture does not dictate what their personality and attitude towards women are like.
If someone is a douchebag, it is just because that person is a douchebag. They do not represent an entire demographic of the population.
The same can be said when someone is particularly sweet and attentive. Not every Mexican man is going to behave the same way, just like not everyone man in your own home country is.
Mexican men and other Latinos are often the subjects of unfair stereotypes. Ironically, these stereotypes are often perpetuated by people who haven’t even spent any time in Latin America nor do they even know any Mexican men themselves!
For instance, a popular stereotype is that Latinos are great lovers and, simultaneously, that they are all cheaters and cannot be happy with one woman. Considering the fact that there are tens of millions of Mexican men and Latinos in the world, do you really think that they all have a hive mind and share exactly the same traits and personalities?
Be careful of stereotypes and generalizations and keep an open mind. Everyone that you date, Mexican or otherwise, is an individual.
Dating outside of your culture comes with its challenges but it is also a lot of fun. Doing so allows you to explore greater depths of foreign culture than you would ever experience just by visiting a country as a tourist.
The Realities of Dating Mexican Men
They are gentlemen
Mexican men are gentlemen. You will find that even when you have been with the same person for months/years and they no longer have to “woo” you, they always go out of their way to treat you like a Queen.
Mexican men will open car doors for you, pull out your chair, carry your things, and always offer to run to the store to get you something. Latina women expect men to behave in a gentlemanly way and Mexican men do not disappoint.
Mexican men are expected to pay for everything
In Mexico, men are expected to pay for women on dates. To ask the woman to split the bill or worse, to allow her to pay, is considered downright offensive.
Understand that this comes from a place of respect rather than sexism. Your Mexican partner likely wants to treat and take care of you.
Taking a girlfriend/dating interest to nice places, buying her dinner, and buying her movie tickets and snacks is an extension of showing your partner that you care. If you offer to split the bill or pick up the cheque occasionally, you may be declined, but at least it will be appreciated.
Machismo is a thing
Mexico is still a very patriarchal society and machismo is a very prominent part of the country’s culture. In other words, there is an expectation for men to be strong, macho, manly men.
They should not participate in feminist things, they should be the main breadwinner and the head of the household and they are responsible for taking care of their women. This is where one of the more negative stereotypes of Mexican men comes into play.
While Mexico may be a more traditional country to some western nations, things are changing. Younger generations in particular are stepping out of traditional gender roles.
So, while some Mexican men may have the expectation that they need to earn the money while the woman takes care of the children and does the housework, others take different views. If you are considering dating Mexican men, have conversations on expectations and aspirations early on.
That way, you can gauge what your partner’s views are on gender roles and so on.
Mexican Men are Brought Up to Respect Women
Mexico may be a patriarchal country but women are respected. Mexican men have been brought up in households with strong women and are usually close to their mothers.
Sure, they may still enjoy having their mom cook lunch or dinner for them into their late twenties. But there is nothing wrong with being close to your mom and the respect is reciprocated.
Mexican men will help their Mom, sisters, female loved ones, and friends, with the things they need help with. Because of the challenging economic situation in Mexico, many Mexican men will move to other states to find work and they often send money back home to support their mothers.
Mexican Men Don’t Mind Cooking and Helping Around the Home
Mexican men are often great cooks. It is not the case that they let the women in their lives do all of the cooking and reach the age of 30 without even being able to boil an egg.
If you are lucky enough to have a Mexican man cook for you, some of the food that they prepare is likely to be among the best that you’ve tried in Mexico. Many Mexican men are happy to cook for their partners too – it all feedback into being romantic, gentlemanly, and wanting to care for their partners.
Mexican Men are Family Oriented
Mexican men are very family-oriented. You can expect that your Mexican beau will call or text his mother daily to check-in, in and be very close with his family in general.
Mexicans often have huge extended families and when there is a birthday, a fiesta, or a special occasion like Christmas or a Quinceanera, the entire family gets together to celebrate it. So, if you find yourself entering a relationship with a Mexican man, you can expect to be invited along to these events and you will likely meet a whole lot of family members in one go!
They can introduce you to exciting new things
Dating outside your culture comes with the opportunity to try a lot of exciting new things. You can sample new cuisines, discover the joy and drama of Mexican telenovelas, find Mexican snacks and street foods that you have never heard of, etc.
Similarly, it can be fun for you to introduce your partner to all of the things that you love about your own country and culture. Every day can be an adventure when you are dating someone from a very different heritage than your own.
They appreciate efforts to embrace their language and culture
Mexican men appreciate your efforts to learn and embrace their culture. Of course, nobody wants to be in a relationship with someone who either doesn’t like or expresses zero interest in their country.
An interest to travel around Mexico and discovering new places and states is appreciated. Even more so are the attempts to learn Spanish (even if you butcher your way through trying to memorize Duolingo phrases) and read about Mexican history.
So read up on Mexican traditions, festivals, and holidays. Plan future trips to places in the Yucatan, Pueblos Magicos, and ancient Maya sites like Mayapan and Edzna.
Culture and upbringing can affect their life views
We have already established that not all Mexican men are the same and that they should not be generalized. However, if there is anything that can impact someone’s outlook and world views, it’s the way that they were brought up and the environment they grew up around.
Nature versus nurture and all that. In other words, if someone has been brought up in a rural, remote part of the country with parents that adhere to traditional gender roles, that is what they will likely expect in their own future.
Similarly, if someone has traveled outside of Mexico or has attended university and is well-educated, they are more likely to be open-minded. You could likely apply these same rules to people from your own country too.
Can handle your spice? You’re a keeper!
Mexican food, by default, is spicy. When you’re in Mexico, you will likely find that things that you didn’t even expect to be spicy are mind-blowingly spicy.
Want some potato chips? Your Mexican friends will pour hot sauce all over them first.
Want a bland western-style sandwich? Don’t be surprised if you find spicy chipotle and random jalapeno peppers in there too.
When you sit down at a table at a restaurant, you will be presented with a selection of salsas of all different spice levels. This is commonly salsa verde, salsa roja, and habanero sauce.
There is even a saying here ”si no pica, no sabe”. This means, “If it’s not spicy, it’s not tasty.”
In reality, Mexican men acknowledge that not everyone is accustomed to eating such spicy food and they may forewarn you about something being “picante”. However, Mexicans will joke with each other that if you as an outsider can handle your spice and keep up with them, you’re a keeper. You are now basically an honorary Mexican.
Intercultural dating may or may not be an issue
Intercultural dating and marriage between Mexican men and people of other nationalities are common. That being said, there are always people who find an issue with people dating outside of their race or nationality, even where it doesn’t concern them!
Obviously, if the prejudice comes from strangers or acquaintances, you can ignore them or cut them out of your life. However, sometimes families may have an issue.
A lot of Mexican parents are liberal-minded and have no issue with their children dating and marrying outside of their nationality and culture. Others may be less happy about this and take time to accept that their son/daughter is with an “outsider”.
If this happens to you, the important thing is that your partner supports you and stands up for you. It is very damaging to constantly be asserted to be “not good enough” because of who you are.
Where to Meet Mexican Men
Mexican men are often very open to dating outside of their culture. People in Mexico are very friendly, warm, and hospitable and it is generally relatively easy to meet and get to know them.
Of course, there is always the old-fashioned option of trying to meet someone in real life by approaching them in a bar or cafe. You may experience this occasionally but at the same time, a lot of Mexican men may be shy to approach foreign people, particularly if they do not know if the other person can speak Spanish or they are insecure about their English.
One great way to meet Mexican men is via events for locals and ex-pats. You may find them organized by Meetup or in Facebook groups. Similarly, online dating is very prominent here.
Online Dating in Mexico
Dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Badoo are available in Mexico. In many ways, Mexican dating culture is not all that dissimilar to dating in the United States – at least in terms of the practice of finding someone to go out with.
Tinder is perhaps the most commonly used dating app in Mexico and you will find that a lot of people have profiles here. Bumble is not all that popular and after a couple of swipes, you may find that there is no one else in your area.
Just like with any country, you may find that there are people that are solely looking for hookups and those that are looking for something more serious. Casual dating is less common in Mexican dating culture.
Going on Dates in Mexico
One thing that is nice about dating Mexican men is that Mexican dating culture is altogether different from that in the US and the west. There are no games.
If someone likes you, they make it obvious and speak openly about what they want and their intentions. Once you start dating someone and going out on dates, it is assumed that you are just seeing each other.
Of course, you will still have the “are we exclusive?” conversation and discuss what you hope to come of the encounter. But things are very different as compared to in the west where people may hop around the exclusivity question and date multiple people for a long period of time, afraid to have any sort of relationship talk.