Mexican Men: What to Expect Dating a Mexican Guy

You might have some questions about meeting and dating Mexican men if you are moving to/travelling through Mexico, or if you have maybe met a Mexicano in your own country. Dating outside your culture can be exciting but it can also mean having to navigate a minefield of different religious and cultural norms, different views on certain lifestyle choices, etc. 

Honestly, there are a lot of stereotypes out there, as well as biased information online, that don’t always portray Mexican and Latino men in a positive light. I am sure that you have heard the popular stereotype that most Latinos are lotharios and womanisers and absolutely cannot be trusted in a committed relationship, right? 

The “machismo” aspect of Mexican culture also means that a lot of people make assumptions that Mexican men may be overly traditional or sexist. And the “Latin lover” stereotype means that a lot of women think that Mexican men are going to be great or adventurous in the bedroom. (Okay arguably that stereotype is not too bad!) 

The reality is that you definitely can’t generalise an entire demographic of people. A person’s race, nationality, or culture does not dictate what their personality and attitude towards women are like and there are good and bad people everywhere, including in Mexico. 

I wanted to write this post to share my own experiences with Mexican men as a British woman living in Merida, Mexico. I have been in a relationship with my Mexican partner for the past few years and often feel that the stereotypes about the men here are unfair. 

My partner and I in Guanajuato City
My partner and I in Guanajuato City

Meeting and Dating Mexican Men 

First and foremost, one thing that is really going to shape a person’s view of women and the world is where and how they have been brought up. (Nature vs nurture, etc, etc). A Mexican guy who has grown up in Los Angeles is going to have had different early life experiences than a Mexican guy who has grown up in his motherland in Northern Sonora. 

Visiting Innsbruck, Austria
Visiting Innsbruck, Austria

Intercultural dating is usually not an issue 

I have mostly found that a lot of Mexican men are very open-minded about meeting people of different races and cultures and from different countries. I had asked my partner and some of our male friends about their thoughts on dating western women and women from different countries and they said that they were interested to know people from other places. 

If you are a foreigner in Mexico, you are usually considered “exotic”.) (I guess what is different is often exciting, right?

At the same time, I have found that many Mexican men (I am sure there may be exceptions) are also open-minded about having a long-term relationship with someone outside their race/culture, whereas in the past when I lived in other countries (namely South Korea and Greece), I felt almost fetishised and that people would see me as a fun experiment but not as someone to potentially settle down with. 

A lot of Mexican parents are liberal-minded and have no issue with their children dating and marrying outside of their nationality and culture. Others may be less happy about this and take time to accept that their son/daughter is with an “outsider” but it is not something I have personally seen or experienced here. 

If this happens to you, the important thing is that your partner supports you and stands up for you. It is very damaging to constantly be asserted to be “not good enough” because of who you are. (I had this experience in Greece with a partner whose parents were extremely disappointed in him being with a non-Greek). 

Spending Christmas in Sinaloa

Mexican men are usually quite the gentlemen 

For the most part, Mexican men are gentlemen. They will open car doors for you, pull out your chair, carry your things, and always offer to run to the store to get you something. When you enter a restaurant, people usually hold the door open for you or pull out your chair. 

When I have been travelling around Mexico solo, random men have always offered to help me to put my bags in the overhead bins or to carry my luggage up flights of stairs.

Latina women expect men to behave in a gentlemanly way and Mexican men do not disappoint. You will find that even when you have been with the same person for months/years and they no longer have to “woo” you, they always go out of their way to treat you like a Queen.

Mexican men are expected to pay for everything 

In Mexico, men are expected to pay for women on dates and it is considered almost offensive to split the bill or allow a woman to pay. Thanks to the Mexican “machismo” culture, a lot of men might feel offended if a woman insists on paying.

As someone who comes from a culture where you normally go “Dutch” on dates and split the bill, this has been something of a culture shock for me. I think that is often polite to still offer to go halves, even if the other person refuses.

Understand that this refusal to allow a woman to pay comes from a place of respect rather than sexism. Your Mexican partner likely wants to treat and take care of you.

Taking a girlfriend/dating interest to nice places, buying her dinner, and buying her movie tickets and snacks is an extension of showing your partner that you care. When my partner and I started dating, he flat-out refused to allow me to pay for anything at all and I felt somewhat cheeky that he wanted to take me out to fancy, elegant places.

I am the higher earner in our relationship and as time has gone on, my partner has become okay with me picking up the bill for things rather than us not doing things because of our different financial situations.

For example, we live in the Yucatan and we might go to a fancy Yucatecan hacienda for the weekend. I will pay for the accommodation and he will pick up the food.

Machismo is a thing  

Mexico is still a very patriarchal society and machismo is a very prominent part of the country’s culture. In other words, there is an expectation for men to be strong, macho, manly men.

This idea dictates that they should not participate in feminist things, they should be the main breadwinner and the head of the household and they are responsible for taking care of their women. This is where one of the more negative stereotypes of Mexican men comes into play.

While Mexico may be a more traditional country to some Western nations, things are changing. Younger generations in particular are stepping out of traditional gender roles.

So, while some Mexican men may have the expectation that they need to earn money while the woman takes care of the children and does the housework, others have different views. Costs of living in many parts of Mexico are rising and households often need two incomes.

Things aren’t perfect here from a place of gender equality but women are increasingly encouraged to be ambitious and go after their own career goals. When dating Mexican men, as with dating anyone, it is a good idea to have conversations about your expectations and aspirations early on.

That way, you can gauge what your partner’s views are on gender roles and so on. Look out for any red flags in the things that they do and say.

Mexican men
Mexican men

Mexican men are brought up to respect women 

Mexico may be a patriarchal country but women are respected. Mexican men have been brought up in households with strong women and are usually close to their mothers.

Sure, they may still enjoy having their mom cook lunch or dinner for them into their late twenties. But there is nothing wrong with being close to your mom and the respect is reciprocated.

Mexican men will help their Mom, sisters, female loved ones, and friends, with the things they need help with. Because of the challenging economic situation in Mexico, many Mexican men will move to other states to find work and they often send money back home to support their mothers. 

Mexican men don’t mind cooking and helping around the home 

Mexican men are often great cooks. It is not the case that they let the women in their lives do all of the cooking and reach the age of 35 without even being able to boil an egg. (True story about a guy I dated in Greece).

Many men live alone when they are at university or move across the country for better work opportunities so even if they are not thrilled about domestic tasks, they learn anyway.

In my relationship, my partner does literally all of the cooking and I am the main breadwinner that works most of the time.

If you are lucky enough to have a Mexican man cook for you, some of the food that they prepare is likely to be among the best that you’ve tried in Mexico. I have discovered so many amazing Mexican dishes from different parts of the country that you don’t see that often in restaurants because my partner made them in the house.

Many Mexican men are happy to cook for their partners too. It all feeds into being romantic, gentlemanly, and wanting to care for their partners. 

Mexican men are family-oriented 

Mexican men are very family-oriented. You can expect that your Mexican beau will call or text his mother daily to check in with her and be very close with his family in general.

Mexicans often have huge extended families and when there is a birthday, a fiesta, or a special occasion like Christmas or a Quinceanera, the entire family gets together to celebrate it. So, if you find yourself entering a relationship with a Mexican man, you can expect to be invited along to these events and you will likely meet a whole lot of family members in one go!  

I remember my first Christmas in Sinaloa with my partner and being shocked at his 9,000 cousins. (Okay, slight exaggeration but we British people usually have small families).

He may want children

A lot of people in Mexico are still quite traditional in terms of their views on what the progression of life should look like. Most people see themselves settling down, having a family and raising kids in the future.

That might be a dream to many women but if you do not want kids, it’s a good idea to bring it up pretty quickly or gauge someone’s thoughts on what they want and whether they would be content without children.

They can introduce you to exciting new things 

Dating outside your culture comes with the opportunity to try a lot of exciting new things. You can sample new cuisines, discover the joy and drama of Mexican telenovelas, find Mexican snacks and street foods that you have never heard of, etc. 

Similarly, it can be fun for you to introduce your partner to all of the things that you love about your own country and culture. Every day can be an adventure when you are dating someone from a very different heritage than your own. 

They appreciate efforts to embrace their language and culture 

Dating Mexican men
A colourful street in Merida, Yucatan

Mexican men appreciate your efforts to learn and embrace their culture. Of course, nobody wants to be in a relationship with someone who either doesn’t like or expresses zero interest in their country.

An interest in travelling around Mexico and discovering new places and states is appreciated. Even more so are the attempts to learn Spanish (even if you butcher your way through trying to memorize Duolingo phrases) and read about Mexican history. 

So read up on Mexican traditions, festivals, and holidays. Plan future trips to places in the Yucatan, Pueblos Magicos, and ancient Maya sites like Mayapan and Edzna

Culture and upbringing can affect their life views 

We have already established that not all Mexican men are the same and that they should not be generalized. If someone has been brought up in a rural, remote part of the country with parents who adhere to traditional gender roles, that is what they will likely expect in their own future.

Similarly, if someone has travelled outside of Mexico or has attended university and is well-educated, they are more likely to be open-minded. You could likely apply these same rules to people from your own country too. 

Can handle your spice? You’re a keeper! 

Mexican food, by default, is spicy. When you’re in Mexico, you will likely find that things that you didn’t even expect to be spicy are mind-blowingly spicy.

Want some potato chips? Your Mexican friends will pour hot sauce all over them first.

Want a bland Western-style sandwich? Don’t be surprised if you find spicy chipotle and random jalapeno peppers in there too.

When you sit down at a table at a restaurant, you will be presented with a selection of salsas of all different spice levels. This is commonly salsa verde, salsa roja, and habanero sauce.

There is even a saying here ”si no pica, no sabe”. This means, “If it’s not spicy, it’s not tasty.”

In reality, Mexican men acknowledge that not everyone is accustomed to eating such spicy food and they may forewarn you about something being “picante”. However, Mexicans will joke with each other that if you as an outsider can handle your spice and keep up with them, you’re a keeper.

You are now basically an honorary Mexican. 

Mexican men have a great sense of humour

Some of the funniest things I have heard in my life have been random jokes and sarcastic comments that I have heard from Mexican men. For me, Mexicans have a very similar dry, sarcastic humour to us Brits and are not afraid to laugh at themselves and make fun of their friends and those around them.

(Not in a malicious way).

People you speak to on dating apps may not speak English

After several years in Mexico, I can finally speak conversational Spanish but that was definitely not the case when I arrived. If you are swiping on Tinder, Bumble, or whatever in tourist areas like Puerto Vallarta, Cancun, Tulum and Mexico City, you are likely to come across plenty of English speakers – both native Mexicans and expats. 

However, outside of those places, English is not widely spoken in Mexico at all. (And it will really make your life easier if you are able to prioritise learning just a few phrases).

Something that myself and my friends here have noticed is that you will often match with people who speak to you in English, yet they are using Google Translate to communicate. When you meet in person, you might find that neither speaks the others language! 

When my partner and I first met, we could barely speak to each other and communicated using Google Translate. Honestly, it was cute and these days we can both speak the other’s language pretty well. 

It pays to have the app downloaded on your phone before you head out. Not everyone seems comfortable with it, but many are open to chatting with a foreigner in this way. 

Facebook groups and pages about Mexican men 

Remember that Latin lover lothario and cheater stereotype that I mentioned? There are several Facebook groups in Mexico along the lines of “Are we dating the same man” where women post photos of men that they are dating to see if anyone else claims them or to talk about their dates. 

Some of the stories of people meeting men who were married and also had multiple partners are startling. However, again, I would say to take this with a pinch of salt. Everywhere you go you are going to find people who play around, and people who seek a committed relationship – including where I am from in the UK. 

It isnt fair to post someones photo and then judge them based on someone else’s past experience because your experience dating the person may be different. (And ex

Where to Meet Mexican Men

Mexican men are often very open to dating outside of their culture. People in Mexico are very friendly, warm, and hospitable and it is generally relatively easy to meet and get to know them.

For example, I became friends with random people where I live in Merida just by regularly going into their cafes and restaurants and getting to know them. It is much easier to just strike up conversations here than in other places.

Maybe you can meet a Mexican guy the old-fashioned way in a bar or something but I have honestly never been approached by a random person here and I feel that a lot of Mexican men may be shy to approach foreign people, particularly if they do not know if the other person can speak Spanish or they are insecure about their English. 

Online dating is prominent here, but people tend to use Facebook Dating a lot more than Tinder and other apps that are popular elsewhere.

Online dating in Mexico 

Dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Badoo are available in Mexico. Tinder is probably the most popular and you will find that a lot of people have profiles here. Bumble is not all that popular and after a couple of swipes, you may find that there is no one else in your area. 

Badoo seems quite sleazy and I received a lot of bizarre messages via that app so it is probably the one that I would least recommend. Facebook Dating tends to be the preferred choice for most people.

(If you spend any amount of time in Mexico, you will find that people love to do everything via Facebook – sell houses, look for rentals, look for furniture, date, etc). The good thing about Facebook Dating is that you can at least see the person’s profile and know that they are a real person and not a catfish unlike on other dating apps.

In many ways, Mexican dating culture is not all that dissimilar to dating in the United States – at least in terms of the practice of finding someone to go out with.

People on here are more likely to be looking for relationships and something a bit more serious, whereas Tinder still has the same “hook-up app” perception in Mexico as it does in the US, etc.

Going on dates in Mexico 

One thing that is nice about dating Mexican men is that Mexican dating culture is altogether different from that in the US and the West. There are no games.

If someone likes you, they make it obvious and speak openly about what they want and their intentions. Once you start dating someone and going out on dates, it is assumed that you are just seeing each other.

Of course, you will still have the “Are we exclusive?” conversation and discuss what you hope to come of the encounter. But things are very different as compared to in the West where people may hop around the exclusivity question and date multiple people for a long period of time, afraid to have any sort of relationship talk.

Unlike in say, the US, Canada or the UK where people may be speaking for weeks on end before finally meeting. If you match with a Mexican guy in the morning, they might ask you what you are doing later that evening or the following day. 

I used to think that casual dating was less common in Mexican dating culture, but there are definitely a lot of people (of all genders) just looking for hookups and fun.

exican men
Mexican men

Final thoughts on meeting and dating Mexican men

Be careful of stereotypes and generalisations and keep an open mind. Everyone that you date, Mexican or otherwise, is an individual.

Whatever comes of your dating experience, you are likely to meet some fun and wonderful people in Mexico.

Do you have any further questions about dating Mexican men, the dating scene here, or travelling around Mexico in general? As I mentioned, I live here and I am happy to help out with any concerns you might have. 

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you need something. Safe travels and enjoy Mexico! Melissa xo

Melissa Douglas

Melissa Douglas is a British Travel Writer based in Merida, Mexico and the Editor-in-Chief of Mexico Travel Secrets. She has over seven years worth of experience in working in travel media and has travelled to 57 countries, mostly solo. Throughout her career, Melissa has produced written content for several high-profile publications across the globe - including Forbes Travel Guide, the Huffington Post, Rough Guides, and Matador Network.

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